Saiyan Roommates
by Patworx
Summary: When Marron divorces Goten, he and his son move in with his non-committal bachelor friend, Trunks.
1. Chapter 1: A Friend in Need

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 1: A Friend in Need**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

Author's Note: This first chapter is a little depressing. It will get much funnier in future chapters.

When Trunks woke up, his vision was blurry and his head was pounding as though he was still a kid and had just came off of another training session with his father. When he looked to the right, he saw his digital clock, which said that it was 1:16 PM. When he looked to the left, he saw the blonde, big-breasted bimbo that he had just spent the night with. She was all dressed up and was smiling at him.

"Wake up, sleepyhead," she said in a tone that combined infatuation with stupidity.

_Idiot,_ Trunks thought to himself. _She's a frickin' idiot. Just like the rest. _

"I just wanted to wait for you take up," she continued. She kissed him on the cheek. Trunks just barely managed to avoid wincing. That kiss was just to romantic to him, and he hated romance.

"Ya gonna call me, tomorrow?" she asked, winking at him. Trunks forced himself to smile.

"Sure I will," he said.

So the blonde bimbo, who was dumb enough to actually think that Trunks would call her back, went back to her place, while Trunks threw up in the toilet for a couple of minutes and headed to the kitchen to pour himself a glass of scotch. This was a typical day in the life of Trunks Briefs.

His mother would go ballistic if she saw him like this. She'd always wanted him to study hard, go to college, earn top degrees, and eventually take over Capsule Corporation, continuing his grandfather's legacy. He went along with her plan and went to college, but when his grandfather unexpectedly died of a heart attack, he left Trunks with a large inheritance. Trunks was set for life after that, and decided that getting a job wasn't necessary. He is 35 years old now, and has spent the five years since then drinking and having sex with random women. Not that his mother would know about that.

It wouldn't be much better if his father saw him. Most likely, he would beat him within an inch of his life and scold him for letting his Saiyan abilities go to waste.

After finishing his scotch, Trunks sat around and watched the tube, but nothing was on. He changed the channel for an hour or two. Then, at about 3 o'clock, the doorbell rang. Trunks opened the door to find someone he hadn't seen for years: his childhood friend Goten.

Goten was the spitting image of his father, from the hair to the orange martial arts uniform. Trunks was initially happy to see his best friend, but then when he looked at Goten's face he noticed a great sadness in his eyes.

"Goten . . ." he began, but then he heard a high-pitched wimper. He tilted his head downward to find the source of that wimper, and saw a little boy who was trying with all his might to resist crying. This little boy had the same hair and uniform as Goten, but he didn't have a nose and his eyes wre big and beady. Trunks had never seen this boy before, but could tell who he was instantly: it was Goten's son, Goku. Next to Goku was a couple of suitcases that Goten had been carrying.

"What's wrong?" Trunks asked as he looked back up at his best friend.

Goten merely stood there and said in a sad, quiet voice, "Marron kicked me out."

After the Dragon Balls had disappeared, Goten fell in love with and eventually married Marron, the daughter of their trusted friend Krillin. A couple of years later, Marron gave birth to a son. They named the son after Goten's father, who sacrificed himself to bring Marron's parents back to life after the defeat of Omega Shenron. The child is six years old now.

For a moment, Trunks was speechless. Then he asked, "Why don't you come in?"

Goten knelt down to look into his son's eyes. "Listen, Goku. I want you stay outside and play while I talk with Trunks, okay. You'll have much for fun out here."

Breathing heavily, Goku nodded and sat down. He laid back against the wall of Krillin's house, and proceeded to play with his Nintendo 3DS.

Trunks and Goten left the boy and the suitcases and walked into the kitchen. Trunks poured himself another glass of scotch.

"Can I interest you in a drink?" asked Trunks.

"No, thank you," Goten replied.

There was an awkward silence. Both men knew what they wanted to talk about but neither one was comfortable enough to go about it. It was Trunks who finally broke the silence.

"So, what happened between you and Marron?"

"I honestly don't know. Things seemed to be going great up until about a year ago. There wasn't anything I noticed that drove us apart, it just seemed like she just became more and more distant for some reason. Then yesterday, she just told me that it was over and that she wanted me gone."

"And she kicked the kid out with you?" Trunks asked in a somewhat horrified voice.

"Just temporarily," Goten assured him. "She says she needs to be alone for a while so she can sort out some personal issues. I honestly don't know what those 'personal issues' are."

"Bulla has been spending a lot of time with Marron lately. Maybe she knows something about it."

"Maybe. Either way, I don't think that Marron and I are getting past this one."

At those words, a few tears leaked out of Goten's eyes.

"I'm sorry Trunks," he said as he wiped the tears from his eyes. "I've tried to be strong for Goku's sake, but-"

"Hey, it's okay man," Trunks assured him. Smiling, he walked up to his best friend and placed his hand on his shoulder. "I'm here for you. I mean it, Goten. If you want to stay here for a while, you can."

Goten smiled. "Thank you, Trunks. Thank you so much." And in that moment, there was an understanding between the two best friends.

"So," Trunks began slyly, "I was planning on ordering a hooker for the evening. Should I order you one as well?"

"Trunks!" Goten exclaimed, blushing.

"Come on, dude," laughed Trunks. He winked at Goten. "I'm sure you could stand to . . . relieve some of that tension right about now."

"Trunks, I'm serious," Goten asserted. "My marriage is still in the process of ending right now. Besides, I have to be there for my son right now, so I really can't afford to be sleeping around."

"Fine, then. Forget I asked."

"And don't order a hooker for yourself either."

"Now wait just a damn minute!" Trunks began.

"Trunks, I know you've been . . . living it up for the past few years, but you can't just bring strange women over here with a six year old in the house."

"Fine," Trunks conceded begrudgingly.

_Man,_ Trunks thought to himself, _what have I got myself into? _


	2. Chapter 2: Trunks Has a Breakdown

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 2: Trunks Has a Breakdown**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

It had been two weeks since Goten and Goku moved in with Trunks. Trunks had respected Goten's wishes by avoiding sex, but he was beginning to feel the effects of this wave of chastity. Because a six year old was living in his house, it meant no bimbos, no hookers, and no one-night stands. Trunks couldn't handle it. It was just too much for him. One day, he was in his living room and he simply couldn't hold it in any more and . . .

"HEAAAAHHH!"

. . . he transformed into a Super Saiyan.

Goten, who had just finished getting dressed for the day, ran into the living room as soon as he sensed the increase in Trunks' power level.

"Trunks, what the hell are you doing in Super Saiyan mode?" asked a confused Goten.

"I don't know!" Trunks snapped. "One minute I'm in here flipping out over not getting any action in two weeks, and the next thing you know I'm a Super Saiyan!"

"Well, see if you can power down," suggested Goten.

Trunks stood firmly in place and closed his eyes for a few seconds. He tried to calm himself down by clearing his mind, but his thoughts inevitably wandered to images of really hot chicks with big breasts and tight asses. After a while, he just gave up.

"I can't do it, Goten!" Trunks yelled in Goten's face, spraying Goten with his spit. Goten was beginning to get creeped out by his friends behavior.

There was an akward silence.

"Trunks, I'm really starting to think you need therapy."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Goten said, eagar to get away from Trunks at that moment.

Goten opened the front door to find the turtle hermit himself, Master Roshi.

"Well, hello there Goten! Hello there, Trunks! Haven't seen you boys in _long_ time."

"Hey there Master Roshi!" responded Goten. "What brings you here?"

"Well, Krillin told me about you and Marron and I just wanted to see how you were holding up."

"Thank you, Master Roshi. I appreciate it. I'm actually doing fine, all things considered. Trunks, on the other hand, is having a bit of a breakdown right now."

"Well, let me in. I might know what to do."

"Sure."

Goten stepped out of the doorway, allowing Master Roshi to enter Trunks' house. Master Roshi turned to Trunks.

"Well, it appears you've entered your Super Saiyan form," Roshi observed.

"Really? BECAUSE I COULDN'T TELL!" screamed Trunks.

"Keep your pants on, boy! I'm trying to help you!" retorted the old master.

But those words only made Trunks more on edge.

"Keep my pants on! KEEP MY PANTS ON! Don't tell me to keep my pants on, old man! Goten has been saying it enough already!"

"Oh really," said Master Roshi, a twinkle forming in his eyes. "Would you care to elaborate on that?"

"Gladly . . ."

For the next half hour, Trunks ranted and raved about Goten's insistence that Trunks not bring women in the house with Goku here. Hearing all the commotion, Goku walked into the living room.

"Daddy, is Uncle Trunks mad at us?" the frightened child asked his father.

"No, son. He's just having a psychotic meltdown. That's all."

When Trunks was done with his rant, Master Roshi said, "Well it sounds to me like you have a serious case of APW."

"What does that stand for?" asked Trunks.

"Acute Pussy Withdrawal."

Young Goku innocently chimed in, "So does this mean we need to get a cat?" causing Goten, Trunks, and Master Roshi to do a face fault.

"Uhh . . . Goku," Goten stammered awkwardly, "Maybe you should wait in your room for a while. This is sort of a grown-ups only discussion."

The confused boy obeyed his father's wishes and went to his room. Once he was gone, Trunks took a few steps toward Goten and pointed at him accusingly.

"Goten, this is all your fault! Something needs to change because I can't go on like this! Two weeks and I haven't seen one set of boobies! I MISS BOOBIES!"

Goten sighed. "Trunks, get it together, will you? Is two weeks without sex really that big a deal?"

Trunks and Master Roshi both gasped at this.

"Are you mad, boy?" yelled Master Roshi. "Just one week is bad enough, but TWO WEEKS! You should apologize to Trunks right now! You're torturing this kid!"

Goten was visibly annoyed by this point.

"I will not apologize!" he insisted. "You are both acting ridiculous!"

Goten ran past both of them and went outside to get a breath of fresh air. Trunks walked up to Master Roshi.

"Please, Master Roshi!" he pleaded. "I need help! I need some relief! Please help me! I'm losing my mind!"

Master Roshi pulled a magazine out of his turtle shell.

"Well, I just so happen to have the latest issue of Playboy here and-"

Trunks immediately swiped the magazine out of the old man's hand and ran straight to the bathroom. Master Roshi sat on the couch for ten minutes. Then there was the sound of a toilet flushing and a non-Super Saiyan Trunks came out of the bathroom, magazine in hand.

"Well, did you enjoy yourself in there?" Roshi chuckled.

"I sure did, Master Roshi. Here's your magazine."

"No, thanks. You can keep it. You need it a lot more than I do, and besides, I have plenty more where that came from."

Master Roshi stood up.

"Anyway, I'd best be getting home right now. Turtle will nag me all day if I'm not back soon."

Master Roshi began to walk toward the door, but he stopped at the last minute, turned to Trunks and held a business card out to him.

"If you ever get the chance, you might wanna call her," Roshi whispered.

Trunks took the card out of the turtle hermit's hand and read the words on it outloud: "If you're feeling lonely, call Business Beth." Trunks gave Master Roshi a puzzled look.

Master Roshi explained: "Business Beth is the leader of one of the most successful prostitution rings in the country. She lives right here in town. Normally, she would just send one of her 'workers' to 'deal' with you, but since she's an 'old friend' of mine, I could probably convince her to come right over and 'deal' with you personally."

"But Goten-" Trunks began. But Master Roshi interrupted him.

"Goten doesn't have to know anything about it." Master Roshi slid his sunglasses down his knows until his eyes were visible and winked at Trunks.

"See you later," Roshi said slyly. He walked out the front door, leaving Trunks staring at the business card. Slowly but surely, a huge grin formed on Trunks' face, reaching from ear to ear.

_This_, he thought to himself, _is my ticket to sweet liberation. _

The front door opened again. Trunks turned around, and as soon as he saw that it was Goten, he stuffed the business card in his pocket and held the Playboy Magazine at his side. Fortunately for Trunks, Goten didn't seem to notice anything was amiss. He simply looked at Trunks and smiled.

"Well, I see you're no longer in Super Saiyan mode," observed Goten.

"Yeah," said Trunks. "I'm much calmer now."

Goten pointed at the magazine. "What's that you've got there?"

Trunks thought quickly about how to respond to Goten's question.

"It's the latest issue of Sports Illustrated," he said.

"Okay. Well, I'm just glad you finally saw things my way."

As Goten walked back to his bedroom, Trunks stared at him in anger.

_Screw you, Goten, _he thought defiantly, _screw you, screw your son, and screw your rules! This is my house, damn it! As soon as your back is turned, I'll invite Business Beth over here and I'll bang her silly, and there isn't anything you can do about it! _


	3. Chapter 3: Goten's Back is Turned

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 3: Goten's Back is Turned**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

Goten and his son had been living with Trunks for three weeks. He was looking for a job but he had been very unlucky at finding one. Thankfully, his luck had changed one day when he received a call on his cell phone.

"Hello?"

He had half expected the call to be Marron finally explaining why she was divorcing him. Instead it was college professor brother, Gohan.

"Hey, Goten! It's been awhile, hasn't it?"

"Gohan? What's up? You heard about the divorce, didn't you?"

"Unfortunately. And I also heard that you're living with Trunks."

"Yep!"

"Considering the lifestyle that Trunks has been living, I don't think it's a good idea to have a six year old around that type of lifestyle."

"Don't worry. Trunks has behaved himself so far. He did have one brief tantrum, though."

"Are you unemployed right now?"

"Yes."

"That's perfect!"

"What?"

"No, I meant that you could come and work for me!"

"Uhh, Gohan . . . I don't think I'd be good at helping you with your students."

"That's not what I want you for. Look, there's a job that I've been wanting to do for awhile now, but I'm too busy at the university. I believe that you could be the one to do this job. And don't worry; I'll pay you well for it."

"When can we discuss it?"

"How about tomorrow at 8?"

"Sounds good! Bye!"

"Bye!"

**THE NEXT DAY**

Goten took out his suit and tie and put them on for the first time ever. He didn't like dressing in formal attire, in fact the only reason he owned these particular clothes in the first place is because his mother bought them for him, but he wanted this job badly. He knew that Trunks had become annoyed with him living here, and he wanted to at least start working toward being able to afford his own home. He was just about to walk out the door and fly to Gohan's place. Trunks had decided to show him off.

"Wish me luck, Trunks!" said Goten.

"Good luck, man," Trunks said casually.

"Take care of Goku while I'm gone," said Goten.

"Of course!" Trunks assured him.

Goten was just about to walk out the door, but then he stopped abruptly and turned to Trunks, eyeing him suspiciously.

"Trunks, do NOT invite girls over here," Goten warned.

Trunks fought hard to keep a straight face.

"Of course, man," he insisted. "You can count on me."

"Promise me, Trunks," Goten insisted.

"I promise," Trunks assured his best friend. As Trunks said those words, he put his right hand behind his back and crossed his fingers.

Still unsure of whether to trust Trunks, Goten headed out the door and flew off to Gohan's house. Trunks ran hurriedly to his bedroom as soon as Goten was gone. Five minutes later, he came sliding out of his bedroom across the living room floor in his underwear and started shaking his ass to "Old Time Rock and Roll" by Bob Seger. He began singing the lyrics:

"_Just take those old records off the shelf_

_I'll sit and listen to 'em by myself_

_Today's music ain't got the same soul_

_I like that old time rock and roll"_

He stopped singing when he turned around to see Goku staring at him, confused.

"Uh, hey Goku," Trunks said awkwardly. "Would you like me to order a pizza?"

#

Goten knocked on the door of his older brother's house. A few seconds later Gohan opened the door.

"Hey Goten," he said wearily. It didn't take a genius to know that Gohan was past his prime, but ever since Buu's defeat, he has looked less and less like the warrior he used to be. There were wrinkles on his forehead. His hair was receding and turning gray. Goten also couldn't help but notice that Gohan was growing a goatee, which added at least five years onto his appearance. He wore a thick pair and glasses and a suit and tie. In his hands was a large textbook. His fingers jammed inside it, marking the spot he had just been reading.

"Let's get to the study, shall we?" Gohan said as he shook his brother's hand. "We have a lot to discuss."

Goten followed Gohan down the long hall, past the kitchen and living room, and eventually in to the study. Gohan sat in the chair behind his desk as Goten sat in one of the chair in front of the desk.

"So what's this job you were telling me about?" asked Goten.

Gohan smiled.

"Goten, how would you like to be the next Great Saiyaman?"

#

Normally, the idea of sleeping with a woman Master Roshi hooked up with would have greatly disturbed Trunks, but in this case he was desperate. And besides, as long as she was hot, he didn't care if she had boned Shenron himself. That playboy magazine Master Roshi gave him wasn't going to last him forever. It was barely lasting him now.

Trunks was using the magazine to aid him in a fierce masturbation session, but he was jolted out of it by the sound of the doorbell ringing.

"Listen, Goku!" Trunks shouted, hoping the child would hear him. "Let Uncle Trunks get the door, okay! Just go watch TV or something!"

But it was too late. He then heard the sound of the lock being undone and the door opening.

"God damn it! I'm gonna kill that kid!" Trunks said to himself.

He hurriedly put his pants back on and ran out of his room, instinctively clutching the magazine. He ran to the front door to find Goku and Business Beth waiting for him. When he saw Business Beth for the first time, he loosened his grip on the magazine, and let it drop to the floor along with his jaw.

Business Beth was one of the hottest women he had ever seen. She had a perfect frame, big boobs, and shiny blonde hair. True to her name, she wore a female business suit and carried a brown leather purse. She also wore a pair of glasses and a beauty mark on the right side of her upper lip, giving her the appearance of a naughty librarian.

"You must be Trunks," she to him said in a sexy voice. "Master Roshi has told me all about you."

Goku, who was still standing by the door, was more confused than ever.

"Shall we go to your room?" Beth asked Trunks.

"Uhh . . . Okay . . ." stammered Trunks.

"Wait a minute!" asked Goku. "What are you guys gonna do."

"Talk business," Trunks said vaguely.

Goku raised an eyebrow. "But I thought daddy said not to bring girls over."

Trunks panicked.

_If that little brat squeals to his father, I'm dead, _he thought.

Beth walked up to Goku and pulled a brown sugary treat out of her purse.

"Here's a brownie, kid," she said dryly.

"Yay! Brownie!" Goku squealed.

She handed in the brownie and started to walk toward Trunks' bedroom.

"But what if he bugs us again?" Trunks asked.

Beth stopped and looked at Trunks.

"Don't worry about it," she assured him. "That brownie I just gave him has a . . . secret ingredient. He won't be bothering us for awhile."

Beth walked seductively to the bedroom. Trunks merely shrugged and followed her.

As Goku finished eating the brownie, a euphoric state overtook his mind.

_That brownie sure was good. I wonder if there's more around here. I'm starving. _

He walked around in a stupor for a while, before slipping and falling on Trunks' magazine. Normally, he would have started crying from hitting the floor so hard, but in his current state of mind, he actually started laughing. He didn't know why he was laughing, he just was. He couldn't control it. The sound of his laugh had a strange echo to it that reverberated around his skull and added to his euphoric state. As he stood up, his eyes darted to the magazine. He picked it up and flipped through the pages. He couldn't believe his eyes: all throughout the magazine were pictures of beautiful naked women.

_I've never seen a naked lady before. There's something magic about them. Maybe they have magical powers? They must! How else could they have made my pee-pee go Super Saiyan. _

He stumbled to his room to scan through the magazine in private.

#

Marron sat upright on the side of her bed lost in deep thought. Her lover hugged her from behind and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"What the matter, baby?" the lover asked.

Marron sighed. "I'm just wondering how Goten will react when I tell him."

"About us?" asked the lover.

"Of course I mean us," Marron said looking her lover in the eyes. "He does deserve to know why I'm divorcing him, but he still loves me and when I tell him about you and I, it will break his heart. I'm just . . . scared, that's all."

"He's going to find out eventually," the lover reminded her. "Keeping him in the dark will do more harm than good. It's probably best if you just come clean now."

Marron stood up, sliding gently out of her lovers arms.

"You're right," Marron decided. "I'm going to drive to Trunks' house right now and tell Goten the truth."

Marron put on some clothes, found her car keys, and gave her lover a goodbye kiss.

"Wish me luck, dear!" said Marron.

She hurried out the door and drove off, determined to tell Goten her deep, dark secret.


	4. Chapter 4: The Hooker Party

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 4: The Hooker Party**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

_Jackpot, _Trunks thought triumphantly.

He was lying naked next to Business Beth, breathing heavily. Beth sat up looking passive.

"You are surprisingly well endowed, Trunks," she said bluntly. "You're bigger than Master Roshi."

Trunks grimaced. "Beth, could you please not mention Master Roshi's penis when talking to me? Because I really don't want to hear about it."

"Duly noted," said Beth.

Beth grabbed her purse from the foot of the bed and pulled out a piece of paper.

"So what would you like to order next?" she said seductively.

"What would you recommend?" asked Trunks, raising an eyebrow.

"I would recommend the Party Deal," she replied.

"What's that?" asked Trunks.

"It means I will invite 19 of my workers here and we'll all have a party," she said bluntly.

"By 'party', do you mean an actual party or an orgy?" Trunks asked.

"The former," Beth said, but then she winked and added, "although the latter will probably happen as well."

"How much will it cost me?" Trunks asked with a hint of suspicion.

"Only ten percent of your original bill," Beth assured him.

Trunks shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

#

"But why do you want me to be the Next Great Saiyaman?" Goten asked his brother.

Gohan's expression darkened. "As you know, Goten, I have tried to stay out of criminal matters and leave them to the police. If there's one thing Omega Shenron has taught us, it's that the human race needs to learn to solve its own problems."

Goten nodded. "That is a lesson none of us will forget anytime soon."

"However," Gohan continued, "There are a select few incidents where things just become too overwhelming for the human race. In those times, I would like to help, but I fear I am getting too old for it, which is why I would like you to take my place."

"So, how often would you call on me?" asked Goten.

"Only under the most extreme circumstances," replied Gohan. "We don't want the human race becoming too comfortable."

"And how often would I get paid?" asked Goten.

"I'm afraid I'll only pay you _after _you've done your job," replied Gohan, "but when you _do_ get payed, you will be payed well."

Goten sat and thought about the deal for a moment. Finally, he said, "It's not the greatest deal but I guess it's the only one I've got. I'll take the job!"

"You're hired, then!" said Gohan, smiling.

A moment later, Goten's cell phone started ringing . . .

"Hello?"

"Goten? It's me, Marron!"

"Marron? What is it?"

"Well, I'm on my way to Trunks' house right now. I'm finally ready to tell you why I'm leaving you."

"Really?"

"Yes, but this is not the sort of thing that can be discussed over the phone. I want to tell you this face to face, so I'd prefer to wait until I arrive at Trunks' place."

"Fair enough. I'm actually visiting Gohan right now, but I can fly over to the house in no time. Bye!"

"Bye!"

Goten hung up.

"Well, see you later, Gohan!" he said.

Goten stood up and looked in the direction of Trunks' house, trying to sense his and Goku's power levels. As soon as he found them, however, a sinking feeling formed in the pit of his stomach and a horrified expression overtook his face.

"Oh God, no!" Goten muttered.

"What is it?" asked Gohan, worriedly. But then he sensed it too.

They both ran out of Gohan's house and halted just outside the front door. They were sure of it now. Trunks and Goku were not alone; in fact, there were 20 other power levels in Trunks' house. And to top it all off, Marron wasn't far away.

"I tried to tell you, Goten! You should have known he'd try something like this eventually!" Gohan said angrily to his brother.

"What do you think is going on over there?" Goten asked his brother. He hoped that Gohan would bring up an option that Marron wouldn't kill him over.

"Probably some wild sex party!" said Gohan.

"I was afraid you'd say that," Goten whispered hopelessly.

Goten closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm gonna murder Trunks for this!" he screamed. A split second later, he shot off like a rocket into the night.

"I'm right behind you!" Gohan called as he shot off right after him.

A few seconds later, Goten turned around to see that Gohan was trailing behind him, desperately trying to keep up. He flew back a ways to see Gohan struggling to fly as fast as he can while keeping the dirt out of his eyes.

"What's taking so long, Gohan?" questioned Goten.

"It has been quite a while since I have flown, Goten," Gohan grunted. "Be patient with me."

Goten groaned, but reluctantly stayed behind to avoid leaving Gohan in the dust.

#

Marron had butterflies in her stomach as she pulled up to Trunks' house. She glanced at the clock in her car; it was 9:50 PM. Slowly, she opened the car door and stepped out, closing the door behind her. She stared at Trunks' house for a few seconds before taking a nervous gulp.

_Well,_ she thought, _this is it._

She began to walk to the front door. The closer she got to the house, the more she could hear loud music being played. The music had an urban, R & B feel to it, the kind you would hear in a dance club somewhere.

_I hope that music isn't too loud for Goku. It might hurt his ears,_ thought Marron.

When she finally reached the front door, she knocked a few times. She had expected to see Trunks answer, a beautiful blonde woman in a bikini staring her in the face. For a moment, Marron's attention was fixed on the woman's large, giggly breasts, causing thoughts to enter Marron's mind that made her heart do summersaults. Those thoughts were rudely interrupted by her maternal instincts, which reminded her that she did not want women like this around her impressionable six year old son.

"Hello there," the woman said seductively. "I was sure that all nineteen of us had arrived but I guess you showed up late. Beth will have to dock your pay for that."

"Excuse me?" asked Marron. The woman did not elaborate on her words, instead moving to the side to let Marron in.

"Come in, sweet cheeks," she said as she raised and wiggled a pointer finger, beckoning Marron to enter the house.

Not knowing what else to do, Marron entered the house to find many beautiful, scantily-clad women performing seedy dances to the club music. Some were even making out with each other. Marron turned the girl who let her in and was about to ask her what was going on, but the girl started to lean seductively toward her.

"Pucker up, buttercup," the girl said slyly, and their lips met.

For a moment, Marron gave in, her mind intoxicated by the taste of the girl's lips. She started to lose control of her own body. Her hand was being drawn like a magnet to the girl's ample bosom. Her fingers almost brushed against the girls perky boobs before her maternal instinct combined with a guilty conscience snapped her out of it.

"No!" Marron said sternly, pulling away from the girl, "I already have someone!"

The girl looked confused. "But you're not allowed to have a significant other if you work as one of Business Beth's hookers?"

"I AM NOT A HOOKER!" Marron shouted. She was deeply enraged at this point. "Now where the hell is my son?"

"Your son?" repeated the woman, "I don't think there are any kids here. You could try looking around if you'd like."

"I think I will," Marron said bitterly.

She squeezed through the crowd of dancing hookers and opened the first door she saw. When she opened the door, and there, lying naked in bed with an attractive brunette on top of him, was Trunks. With a blanket covering their lower halves, the brunette hooker slid off of Trunks and shot Marron an annoyed glance while Trunks shot her a terrified one.

"Wait your turn, bitch!" the hooker yelled in an exasperated voice.

"Buzz off you stupid whore!" Marron shouted back. "Trunks and I have some things to discuss!"

"Just do as she says! Please!" Trunks begged the hooker.

"Fine!" the hooker said dejectedly. She reluctantly got out of bed and walked naked back to the bathroom.

"Well," growled Marron, "I'm waiting!"

"I couldn't help myself!" said Trunks hopelessly. "Your ex-husband wouldn't let me get any pussy for the past three weeks! I figured that as long as he's at his job interview with Gohan I could sneak a few quickies in!"

"Did you even think about Goku?" yelled Marron.

"Not really," Trunks admitted. "If it makes you feel any better, I would never have done this if I'd known you were coming."

"Yes Trunks!" said Marron sarcastically, "Of course it makes me feel better knowing that you would only corrupt my son behind my back!"

#

Around this time, Goten and Gohan finally arrived and landed in front of Trunks' house.

"You're a dead man, Trunks!" yelled Goten.

Goten didn't even knock. He opened the door and ran right into the house with Gohan sprinting behind him. Goten and Gohan suddenly found themselves surrounded by hot, big breasted women.

"What the f-" began Goten, but then he saw Trunks dash out of his room wearing a bathrobe, with Marron following him. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest and as soon as she saw Goten, she walked up to him looking very pissed off.

"I'm going to kill you, Goten!" she breathed menacingly. "And that goes double for your nymphomaniac friend!"

Trunks quickly found the radio and turned it off, bringing the entire party to an abrupt halt. The hookers all stared at Trunks, clearly annoyed with him.

"I don't mean to be rude ladies," shouted Trunks, "but you all need to get the hell out of here! We have a bit of a situation going on!"

Within minutes, the hookers had all packed up and left. Business Beth was the last one to leave.

"It's been a pleasure serving you, Trunks," she said seductively. "I hope we can do this again sometime."

#

The only people in the living room now were Goten, Trunks, Marron, and Gohan.

"You're gonna kill us now, aren't you?" Goten asked Marron nervously.

"Not yet," retorted Marron. "First things first; where is Goku?"

"Beats me," interjected Trunks. "The last time I saw him he opened the door for Business Beth, he asked what she was doing here, and she gave him a brownie. That's all I remember."

"He might be in his room," said Goten. He quickly headed for Goku's room. Marron followed him.

He opened the door to Goku's room. Goku was sitting cross-legged on his bed reading a magazine. Knowing that he'd found his son gave him a bit of relief – that is, until he noticed what magazine Goku was reading.

"Is he in here?" asked Marron as she entered right behind Goten.

"Oh God!" she yelled when she saw the cover of the magazine. She swiped it out of Goku's hands. "Goku, what are you doing looking at this filthy smut?"

"Dude," Goku said dreamily, "that magazine is totally righteous. No wonder Uncle Trunks likes it so much."

Marron gave Goten a piercing angry gaze before turning back to Goku.

"Goku," she said, "in the future, I do not want you looking at these kinds of magazines! Understand?"

Goku was silent for a moment. Then, without any warning, he burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. Marron grabbed him by the sides and lifted him up to examine him. As he stopped laughing, she looked into his bloodshot eyes and came to a horrifying realization.

"Is he high?" she asked Goten angrily.

"Of course not!" assured Goten. "How could he have gotten-" but then he remembered something Trunks had just said.

"Oh crap!" exclaimed Goten. "The brownie! The one that the hooker gave him! It must have been full of pot!"

Marron cradled Goku in her arms. "That does it, Goten! Having Goku around Trunks has brought nothing but trouble! I'm taking him back!"

"Wait!" pleaded Goten.

They ran into the living room, past Trunks and Gohan, out the front door, and finally reached the car.

"I don't wanna hear it, Goten!" Marron spat. "I'm putting my foot down! I refuse to let your lecherous friend turn our son into some perverted junkie! We can make arrangements for custody later! Goodbye!"

And with that, she slammed the car door and drove away. Goten simply stared after her, his heart shattered into a million pieces.


	5. Chapter 5: An Understanding

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 5: An Understanding**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

Author's Note: The next couple of chapters will take a considerably less comedic tone, especially this one.

A disheartening vibe filled the house as Trunks and Gohan waited in the dimly-lit living room. Trunks was pacing the floor nervously. Gohan was sitting quietly in a chair next to the window. The tension in the room filled the air like the foul stench of Master Roshi after he had eaten too much sushi and bean stew.

"I must say Trunks, you have gone beyond my expectations," Gohan said suddenly. "I always assumed you would at least wait until Goku had hit puberty before you introduced him to porn and drugs. Clearly you have become more of an imbecile than even I gave you credit for. Way to go!"

"Bite me Gohan!" snapped Trunks.

Neither of them spoke for a few more minutes.

"What's he doing now?" asked Trunks.

Gohan briefly glanced out the window. "He's just standing in the exact place he has been for the past hour and a half."

"Just great," muttered Trunks.

Fifteen minutes later, Goten finally came back into the house looking defeated. Trunks started walking toward him holding up his arms in preparation for an embrace.

"Hey, buddy it's okay-" Trunks began, but before he could continue talking, Goten punched him in the face and sent him crashing into the ground.

"Get away from me, asshole!" Goten spat. "This is all your fault! I told you not to bring women over, and what did you do? You brought a ton of them over! And you didn't seem to have a problem with them drugging my son! And now thanks to you, my ex-wife thinks I'm an irresponsible father and I don't know when I'll see my kid again!"

Trunks picked himself up and looked at Goten with tears in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Goten," he pleaded. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"That's the problem Trunks!" yelled Goten. "You weren't thinking at all. You allowed your cock to dictate your actions and I paid the price for it! What the hell is wrong with your? The Trunks I know would never be so selfish!"

"Look," Trunks said. "I know you're mad now, but after you've had a night to sleep on it, you might cool down."

"No way, Trunks! You've gone too far this time! I'm moving in with Gohan!"

Trunks was devastated. He had been annoyed that Goten and Goku's presence in the house was keeping him from getting laid, but he didn't want them to leave. At least, not like this.

Goten gestured to Gohan. "Come on, Gohan! Let's get the hell outta here!"

"I am afraid that won't be happening tonight, Goten," retorted Gohan. "The flight to get here wore me out too much. We shall spend the night here and then Videl will pick us up in the morning."

Goten and Gohan stayed in the guestroom for the night. Trunks eventually went to bed, but not before drowning his sorrows in an old bottle of vodka.

* * *

><p>Goten and Gohan laid awake in the guestroom bed. Most men would find it odd sleeping in the same bed together, but Goten and Gohan didn't mind. For Goten, it brought back memories of when he was a little boy.<p>

"Thanks for your understanding," said Gohan. "I'd love to go back home, but I'm just so exhausted right now."

"No problem," Goten said dimly. He seemed to just be staring up at the ceiling, occupied by his thoughts.

"What is on your mind, little brother?" Gohan asked with concern. Goten slowly turned on his side to face Gohan.

"When did Trunks become such a prick?" Goten asked bluntly. "He was never like this when we were kids, teens, or even in college. It's like I don't even know him anymore."

"It's been years since you two have seen each other," Gohan answered him. "People change."

"Well, I guess it doesn't matter," Goten said. "We're leaving here tomorrow, and if I ever speak to Trunks again, it'll be too soon."

"Goten, don't be so dramatic," Gohan scoffed. Trunks is your best friend. He always will be."

There was a pause before Goten finally muttered, "Maybe you're right."

"Besides," Gohan added, "you do share a trickle of the blame for what happened tonight."

"Excuse me!" spat Goten.

"Well," explained Gohan, "Trunks did open up his home to you and your son when you needed it the most. For such a selfish bastard, that was a pretty nice thing to do. If you ask me, telling him that he's not allowed to have sex is a poor way to repay him. I may not approve of Trunks' lifestyle, but he is an adult and he does have the right to live the way he wants in his own house."

By this point, Goten was staring venomously at Gohan.

"I just thought I'd give you something to think about," Gohan said as he turned away from his brother, "Goodnight, Goten!"

* * *

><p>When Goten walked into the kitchen the next morning, he saw Trunks sitting down wearing nothing but a T-shirt and underwear. He was holding his head and moaning.<p>

"You had a few too many last night, didn't you buddy?" Goten asked quietly.

Trunks turned to face Goten and nodded painfully.

"You're speaking to me now?" asked Trunks.

Goten slowly walked to the kitchen table a seat to Trunks. They both sat there for a few minutes.

"I'm sorry Goten," Trunks finally said. "I'm sorry I got your kid taken away. Believe me, I feel awful about it and I wish I could make it up to you."

"Apology accepted, Trunks," Goten assured his best friend. "And I'm sorry I was so pushy about the whole 'no sex' thing. It was wrong of me to just walk into your house and force you to make all these lifestyle changes. Tell you what! From now on, you can bring women over, but just be discreet about it. Okay?"

"Sounds like a deal!" said Trunks. The two friends shook hands and walked into the living room. Gohan was sitting down drinking a cup of coffee.

"Hey boys!" he greeted. "Are your two feeling better?"

"We sure are!" said Goten.

"Although," Trunks added, "I do wish this damn headache would go away!"

"That is just what you have to live with when you chug booze like a dehydrated horse," Gohan retorted.

Outside, all three men could hear the sound of a car horn beeping.

"That must be Videl! Good luck and goodbye, boys!" said Gohan. He set his glass on the coffee table and headed out the door.

"So," Trunks asked Goten, "what can I do to help you get your kid back?"

"Do you think there's anything you can do?" Goten asked in return.

"Well, I don't know, but I'd like to try. I owe you, Goten."

The two best friends spent the rest of the evening discussing in great detail how they were going to convince Marron to give them partial custody of Goku.


	6. Chapter 6: Marron's Lover

**Saiyan Roommates, Chapter 6: Marron's Lover**

_**A Dragon Ball Z fanfic by Patworx**_

Goten and Trunks were nervous as they landed in front of Marron's house. They both turned to look each other in the eyes and reassure one another, at the same time not being sure of themselves.

"So here's how this will work," Goten said. "You come with me and help me apologize to Marron. Just tell her that you will agree not to let Goku see any of your 'conquests'. Hopefully, she's cooled down enough to be reasonable about this."

"I'm not sure this will work, Goten," Trunks said. "I mean, Goku was stoned for God's sake. If Marron's parenting style is anything like my mother's was, this won't be easy."

Goten shrugged. "Well, the only thing we can really do is try."

As the two men slowly approached the house, Goten took his old set of housekeys out of his pocket and unlocked the door . . .

* * *

><p>"Okay, now you stay at the end of the hall," Goten said to Trunks. "I'll warm her up and then you can come in for the kill."<p>

Walking down the hall, Goten stopped to look in Goku's room. Goku was asleep in bed. Goten felt tempted to walk in and say give him a hug, but decided it would be better to talk to Marron first. As he got closer and closer to Marron's bedroom, he heard strange sounds.

He heard voices.

Two of them.

And the bed was shaking.

He hustled to the bedroom and opened the door to find Marron completely naked, in bed, and straddling a familiar blue-haired beauty (who was also naked).

"Marron? Bulla? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?" Goten had a difficulty finding words to express his complete and utter shock at seeing his soon-to-be ex-wife getting it on with his best friend's hot younger sister.

Upon hearing Goten screaming, Trunks figured that now was the time to run down the hall and back his best friend up.

"Look Marron, I will be careful from now on, I swear!" Trunks began to say, but then he realized just what he was looking at. At first he was shocked at catching Marron and Bulla in bed together, but then he was turned on by the idea of hot lesbian action. And after that, he was disgusted with himself when he remembered that one of the women was his sister.

"MARRON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HAVING SEX WITH MY SISTER?" Trunks blurted.

* * *

><p>Marron and Bulla had known each other since they were young. It wouldn't be accurate to say that they were always the best of friends since Marron was a few years, but as they both got older their friendship grew stronger. And after the defeat of Omega Shenron, it developed into something more . . .<p>

Marron had never really liked boys that much. Not that she didn't try; she just couldn't get into them. But she thought Bulla was beautiful, and she helped her cope with the temporary deaths of her parents at the hands of Super 17. Bulla herself did like guys, but she always felt a slight attraction to her own gender as well. As their feelings for each other grew stronger, they began to keep their distance from one another, and Marron convinced herself that she was in love with Goten. She was sure that after awhile she would forget about Bulla. She was wrong. After years of avoiding eachother, a chance encounter resulted in them reconnecting again. Eventually, it evolved into a yearlong affair behind Goten's back, after which Marron decided she couldn't handle the secrecy anymore. She decided to leave Goten.

They explained all of this to Goten and Trunks, who were shocked but understanding. Bulma, Vegeta, Krillin, and 18 were even more taken aback by this new relationship, but they accepted their daughters no matter what.

Goten did a few odd jobs for Goten as the Great Saiyaman, but since such jobs were far and few between, he decided to continue looking for work in the meantime. After a few months, he finally found a job working as a trainer at a gym. It wasn't long before he had enough money to buy his own apartment.

* * *

><p>Goten slowly walked out of his room lugging his suitcase behind him. He knew he was going to miss this place, but he also knew that better things awaited him. He entered the living room expecting Trunks to be there, but he wasn't. He then walked into the kitchen and found Trunks sitting at the table eating a sandwich. Goten also noticed a glass of Pepsi in front of his best friend. It seemed as though Trunks was drinking less and less throughout the time Goten had been living with him. Perhaps something about Goten being here had changed him. Or perhaps it was the recurring presence of a child in his home.<p>

"So are you leaving now?" Trunks asked Goten.

"Yes. Thanks for everything," Goten replied.

Trunks stood up and went to hug his best friend.

"Take care of yourself, Trunks," said Goten.

"I will," Trunks told him.

Trunks walked with Goten over to the front door. As they walked, Goten asked him, "So what are your plans for today? Another evening with Business Beth?"

Trunks shook his head. "I'm actually having dinner with my parents. I haven't seen them in awhile, you know."

"Do you think your mother will try to get you to work for Capsule Corp again?" wondered Goten.

"Who's to say I wouldn't say 'yes'?" asked Trunks. "This place is getting boring, anyway. Actually, I'm beginning to think it's been boring all along and it just took me till recently to realize it."

Goten smiled. "Good for you."

They were finally at the door.

"Goodbye Trunks," said Goten.

"Goodbye Goten," replied Trunks.

And with the closing of the door, Trunks realized that he was alone again. He had wished so badly to be alone when Goten and Goku first moved in, and having that wish had been granted just gave him a hollow feeling in his soul. He thought that the life of a bachelor would be so wonderful, but it really wasn't. Sure, he had banged lots of women, but did he really care about any of them? No. Of course not. He knew for certain now that he was going to say 'yes' if Bulma offered him a place at Capsule Corp, and if she didn't, he would get down on his knees and beg for it.

And who knows? Maybe somewhere down the road, a wife will be in the cards . . .

Author's Note: This was my first multi-chapter fic. I hope you all enjoyed it. I would appreciate overall opinions of the series. Hopefully, my next fanfic won't be far behind.


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